Tuesday, May 17, 2011

modesty

Yesterday was a very happy day. Partly because I went driving with my dad again (on REAL streets!), partly because my sister, mom, and I got delicious Caribou coffee drinks for really cheap, partly because I got new flip-flops and a new dress. But the thing that stuck out the most to me, the thing that made me almost giddy was something not all that exciting, to some people.

I found two pairs of summer shorts.

Yes I did. And, these aren't your ordinary show-everything-but-underwear shorts. They were modest! And no, they weren't capris. And no, they don't come all the way to my knees. And yes, they are very cute! In my opinion :)

Modesty is a very important issue to me. I take extra time in the fitting room to make sure that the clothing isn't too low, short, tight, and doesn't show too much skin. I feel that God wants His children to be modest; the Bible even talks about it!

I really think that being modest is a huge way to love the men around us. I am not someone of the opinion that "if he has a problem with it, he better fix his sick mind!" I do believe that men should avert their eyes if something a girl is wearing causes them to stumble, but I think it's better if the girl never wears the problematic clothing in the first place.

You know, one thing that makes modesty difficult is that girls sometimes don't have a clue about what's modest vs. immodest. Things that are hard for guys probably wouldn't make another girl blink an eye. Sometimes I will wear something that my mom and I think is modest, but my dad will point out something about it that we hadn't even noticed. Which brings me to my handy-dandy little list! :)

1. Consult your dad. He's a guy, and he cares so much about you. He is a great resource; he can tell you when something will be difficult for a guy because he's been there himself.

2. Pray! Modesty is a heart issue at it's core, and only God can change hearts. Girls can be covered from head-to-toe and still be immodest if their heart is in the wrong place and they are seeking that form of attention. If your desire is to be modest, ask the Lord to give you a heart that embraces modesty and longs for it.

3. Use this modesty survey done by Alex and Brett Harris. It has been an invaluable tool for me! Read the main page and the Survey Overview first, and then browse the Survey Results to see if your clothing could be causing guys around you to stumble. If so, see if your mom would like to go out shopping! :) Now, I do have one precaution here: sometimes, you have to ignore some of the comments, because in some cases, the guys interviewed seemed to need the girl to walk around in a head-to-toe box. That's just not practical, and at that point, the problem is really theirs. However, sometimes the comments are super helpful, because they let me know which kinds of tank tops are fine, and what makes one borderline-bad or just plain bad.

Okay. So know I've spat a bunch of stuff at you that you may or may not have wanted to hear! But now I want to tell you something.

While it does take a little bit of extra effort to find them, modest, stylish clothes are not non-existent. You can find cute clothes--no matter what your style is--that are modest by doing a little digging. You don't have to shop at online stores that sell matching, modest dresses for the whole family (not that there's anything wrong with that! It's just not my taste). Case in point: I found the aforementioned shorts at Target. :)

On to one of my favorite style/modesty tips: Some clothes that would be immodest by themselves are made cuter and modest by layering! I use camis ALLLLL the time, because most of my shirts would be too low on their own. I love the layered look anyway, so it's no problem for me--until the camis get stretched out and they themselves are too low :) But then it's just another excuse to go shopping again!

Well. Maybe that was helpful, maybe not. But now I have to go. I would love it if you would ask questions in the comments!

Over and out.

3 comments:

bronteelizabeth said...

Awesome post Katie! Thanks for sharing!

judi said...

great tips, Katie! You have a lot to share with people..

The Nimba-Jimbian said...

I absolutely agree. Modesty is very important to me, as well. I also think dressing immodestly is not very healthy, in the sense that the reason many women do it is because they want to be noticed by men. (And then, of course, the way they're being noticed is not the right way, and that just leads to more and more trouble... One of the many tragically broken things in this modern world.)

Great post. I'm so glad you found some modest shorts! Hopefully I'll get to see them sometime! 0=) I bet they're super cute. =)